Hype Train #2: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Planet of the Apes 3, 2017.

Hey Everyone!

So, it’s been a while since I’ve done a Hype Train post… so, with a few events coming out that have perked my interest, I thought ‘eh what the hell, let’s do another hype train!’ And here we are now.

 Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2

About a week or two ago, a trailer was released for Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2, the sequel to the 2015 Marvel sci-fi action film. The first film was awesome, packed with lasers, explosions, heaps of different alien creatures, cheesy (and often quite childish) humor, and absolutely brilliant characters.

So basically, for a Marvel film, it was an A+. And it looks like they’ll be continuing the trend of awesomeness with this installment.

Proof: BABY FREAKING GROOT.
And Rocket dual-wielding laser handguns. Need I say anything more?

HYPE LEVEL: 11/10

War For The Planet Of The Apes (Planet of The Apes 3)

So, last time I wrote up something about this there was literally no information released. Like, nothing, only a little wallpaper and teaser that contained some very arty non-film footage and a quote from the 2nd film.

Today, (or at least as I write this) they released the second trailer. And dang, it’s awesome.

It looks like the apes have stepped up the technology in the movie: now they’re using bows. And Caesar’s English has improved. Does that mean we’ll get a lot of dialogue in this one between Haymitch (sorry, Woody Harrelson. You’ll never live down that character.), the big bad-guy of this film, and Caesar before the final battle? That’d be pretty neat.

Because it’s always fun when apes put us humans to shame on the big screen.

HYPE LEVEL: 9/10

 2017 (New Year!)

So, I think it’s pretty universally known that this year really sucked. Like, really sucked.

First of all, David Bowie died. Second of all, America was forced to choose between another Civil War or World War 3, or, if you rather, Magikarp and President Coin. (ooh we’re getting all the Hunger Games references today!)

And then there was a certain incident involving a certain gorilla that everybody loved and cherished. (RIP Harambe, thanks for all the dank memes. Sadly not only are you really dead, but you may or may not have been transported to that particular corner of Valhalla reserved for dead dank memes. Sorry, dude.)

Basically, 2016’s crappiness can be safely summed up in this year’s Youtube Rewind.

So what can cure us of this horrible, disgusting, DESPICABLE, UNDENIABLY UNSPEAKABLE year?

ANOTHER YEAR THAT WILL HOPEFULLY MAKE UP FOR THE CRAPPY ONE!

Yep, in under a month we’ll be granted a new year – complete with new faces, new pop-culture releases, and plenty of, erher, dank memes to go ’round.

(I swear if I use the term dank memes one more time I will probably stone myself to death with any pebble I can lay my hands on.)

HYPE LEVEL: eh…/10

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So, that’s it for today. Is there anything happening soon that you’re looking forwards to? Are you also excited about the things listed above? If so, go ahead and post a comment below!

I’ll see you lads in the next post.

From your mate-y mateington chappie chap,

Thomas “The Mad Writer” McKenna